All of her girlfriends were very fashionable, always withtheir hair and makeup perfect. She said that if I wanted a chance withCindy I needed to start...doing things more like Cindy was use to. "Do yourealize how much she is changing just by dating a guy? I really want tosee the two of you happy, but it's going to take some work on your part"I hadn't thought about it that way, so I agreed to the manicure. Larasaid it would take a while to dry and offered a free hair cut, so I saidyes.While. “We’re all the same people in here. By the time you’re sprung, you’ll realize you’re just the same as everyone else in here.”“Then why am I in jail? I didn’t do anything to anyone.”“Seeing hoes is not why you’re in jail. There are other reasons and circumstances involved that you can’t see just yet. Tell me something—why did you start seeing hoes? What was the reasoning behind it?”“I dunno. I guess because I couldn’t find a girlfriend.”“And why do you need a girlfriend so badly?”“Because I’m a. "Hey look, it is an opportunity to see how the other laugh lives. Let'shave some fun with it. Ok?" What do you mean?" Let me fix you up and see how you look as a girl. It is only for acouple of hours until the wash is done. What do you say?"I can't say it was something I ever thought of doing, but she seemedreally excited at the idea and I decided if it would get me closer toher I would do it.She clapped her hands and giggled. Then she took my hand and led me toher room."Drop the jeans and. I know that if I could see my face I would be horrified at the sunken depth of my eye sockets, at the thinness of my hair and the skeleton-like qualities I have taken on so greedily to end the pain within my soul. I know I must choose. Power or continued pain. The feeling of the universal creation flowing through my body would be as sweet as any kiss, as intoxicating as any liquor, yet I fear it. I fear what temptations I would have, I could undo the separation. I could heal myself. Become.
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